Are you Present?

"Now we are all here in the presence of God to listen to everything the Lord has commanded you to tell us." - Acts 10:24

There are weeks that God is speaking to me directly through our pastor. Every word that comes out of his mouth was put there for the soul purpose of teaching ME, showing ME what I need to be shown in a way that MAKES me listen! I haven't felt very spiritual the last few weeks. After everything that we've gone through and all the blessings that have been showered onto my family in the last three months you'd think I would do nothing but thank God and feel blessed every second of every day. But the truth is, everyday life takes over. I get into my ruts, I forget to enjoy the simple things, I clean my house, do my laundry, pick up the kids from school, check my blog and facebook friends...I forget to watch my children play outside, to hug my husband for 30 seconds a day, to enjoy the dinner with the family instead of use it as an uninterrupted 20 minutes of good lecturing time. It seems incredible to me even as I type this how quickly that happened again! It was less than three months ago I was in the hospital watching my husband struggle to breathe and praying every second of every day for God to heal him!

I get lost. I forget to be 'present' in my faith. I forget to take that "me time" to pray; to thank God for the ABILITY to be in my ruts! He has given me the gift of forgetting! If I think about it, I can put myself right back in that place we were three months ago. But I do HAVE to think about it! It hasn't stayed with me...I have forgotten! How amazing is that! But in that gift from Him I struggle to stay out of the ruts I know He is trying to get me to fill in. I have to work at hearing Him, at LISTENING to Him, at being 'present'.

I woke up this morning to a text from Mom. "Are we going to church this morning?" My desire was to stay in bed and go back to sleep and I found myself typing "ya"...*send*. Hmm...odd cuz that's not what I WANTED to say. Then this sermon about "showing up and being present". How can we hear, how can we listen, how can we learn if we aren't there? God spoke to Cornelius in Acts 10. He tells him to send some men to Joppa, to find a man named Simon who is also called Peter, staying with Simon the tanner in a house by the sea. Now that is PRETTY specific! Then God spoke to Peter and told him there are men at your house, go greet them and go with them. Two parties that listened to God, they were 'present' in their walk with Him and therefore were able to do their part in his plan. Peter went on to share God's word with people who did not think they were worthy of God's love because they were not the chosen ones.

I want to be 'present'. I want to hear God speak to me and act on what he wants from me. I have changed so much this year and I know it's because I am finally walking the path that is for Him. My outlook on life, on raising children, on my marriage, on my extended family, on my home, even on my pets has changed SO MUCH. It astonishes me. But then again, I think I've finally just shown up.

Becky Bagenski, present.

"To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy--to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, befrore all ages, now and forevermore! Amen" - Jude 24